Dark Garret

 Hello everyone!

Well, I've had a fortnight off - that's two weeks for those that don't know it's more than a game. This last couple of weeks seems to have gone by with a lot happening but very little to show for it, which is thoroughly frustrating. Thoroughly frustrating seems to be the best way to describe it as well.

I managed to drastically alter my sleep pattern, mostly by staying up for as long as I could for a week until I was waking up at a reasonable time. That's decent enough, but it always feels like I'm courting a severe migraine every day I'm doing it and that's not exactly conducive to getting much in the way done.

It's not that I've not done anything, it's that that really gets in the way of stuff. Especially when the fire alarm in the communal area has been broken and been on for days, and that is, to say the least, meant to be one of the most jarring sounds invented by mankind. Harrumph. It has recently been fixed though, but this seems to be happening every week or two now, so if there is a real fire in my block of flats, I'm not sure if any of us would actually be safe from it. Again, harrumph. Harrumph indeed.

On more productive notes, I managed to plan a story I've been meaning to plan for a while. One that involves those lovely Corpse Breeches and how making them is perhaps better not left down to high school students because it'll perhaps involve a bog man's revenge. This story started out with a talk between a friend and I and I wanted to try and write something in the vein of an American '80s b-movie as a number of them seem to revolve around high school students getting themselves into a lot of silly shenanigans, especially when they decide to wind up inbred hillbillies.

Nabrok - Icelandic Corpse Breeches

But I distracted myself from this when I looked into a character from a beloved English sitcom called Dad's Army. After a bit of research, the show's Corporal Jones, with his thirty years as a career soldier, slaughtering people, and then as a butcher for another thirty years, slaughtering animals generally made me think that this person might have a patio that suspiciously hasn't been completed in many decades. I figured this could make the basis for a curious little story where his thirst for blood might make him think that cannibalism would be a suitable way to relieve rationing.

Corporal Jones
from Dad's Army

I also managed to find a couple of my old ghost stories that I did a few years back and have ideas of updating/rewriting them, but how I do them or release them, I'm unsure. That's going to have to take a little bit of thought.

One of the reasons I fished them out is because I had the misfortune of missing the UK Ghost Story Festival that was on a couple of weekends ago. You can also follow them on Twitter here. It's something I've really wanted to get involved in when it started a few years ago before it took a break for The Disease. I wanted to get involved when I originally wrote the stories years ago, but there were other commitments at the time and the ghost stories were for something else as well and things didn't really correspond well at the time. Now I can rethink things and I can try again for next year.

But the thing is, these just seem to be distractions from distractions from distractions. I'm not too sure how to get back to where I should be. I still need to get another fantasy novella finished as quickly as possible to be released alongside the other one. But that seems to be depressingly less and less likely. I should have them both released by now, but well...

It just seems to go to frustrate and addle myself as time goes on. It doesn't help that when I've asked for help, it has been anything but, or that some of the support from, say, parents has been counter-productive if it exists at all, so I'm not really sure what to do about all of that. Sometimes I feel absolutely ignored, but I think that's just partly me winding myself up. A lot of the help seems to be from folks who haven't read any of my stuff, nor this blog, and who's idea of helping someone focus is to say that they should work on many more stories. much of the help seems to be along the lines of: "Why get stressed out because you're working on five novellas when you could work on eight instead?" Yeah, that's not quite the help I'm after and it seems to be all I'm getting from folks at the moment and to be honest, with the deadlines to get stuff finished as well, its actually got to me a lot. I'm not sure how to get myself out of this if I'm honest. Sometimes it feels like I don't have the support for when I need it. Being told that I should just sell ideas or other snide comments doesn't feel like actual help. It gets exhausting having to explain that that doesn't actually help focus the mind through melt downs, depression and the like to a point where things are accomplished.

I suppose I've got to just push forward. There are a couple of plans for fantasy novellas I'm finishing off, then I'll probably be back asking which to choose to accompany the other.

I think partly, I'm just being harsh on myself. It's not been a good couple of months and perhaps I'm just grumbling, but sometimes it really does bog me down. Maybe I am being harsh thinking that about others. I'm unsure. It doesn't feel like I'm getting the support though.

This, particularly with the news of my grandma dying, may be something that I need to sort out. I think I perhaps do need to actively look for more support that is actually supportive because this last couple of months has just felt tougher and tougher in general and I think I'm now on the verge of feeling like I'm actual depression and I don't want things to get worse from there. And to be honest, just saying all of this, that I have been struggling a lot, putting pen to paper, has helped a lot. Hopefully things will get better.

Well, that's the writing news up. I've whinged and moaned and this evening I'll get on with some of these fantasy novella plans. Lets see where I am next week.

On the good side, I did manage to get a couple of likes on my Facebook page, which is good.

On other writing news, one of my favourite authors, Christopher Fowler, unfortunately lost his battle with cancer on Friday just gone. The Guardian did a lovely piece on him and I'd thoroughly recommend looking for his books. I can particularly recommend his huge Bryant and May series. Its seen me through a few rough times and I will miss him and his writing.

Christopher Fowler

Strange Tides
by Christopher Fowler,
a Bryant and May novel

On some actual good news. there has been a new magazine started up called New Edge Sword & Sorcery. They had an issue 0 out to test the waters, which you can check out that I covered in previous posts and they managed to successfully Kickstart their issues 1 and 2, They have a Facebook group which you can follow here for any updates and to join in if you wanted.

New Edge Sword & Sorcery
Issue 0

And onto some other news that's pretty good, news that Segways into some wargaming stuff, The Woods by Oakbound Studio has another Kickstarter out themselves.

The Kickstarter is for the Hobgoblins of the Black Wastes. The rules for which will be in a forthcoming book. But they would be good for an Oldhammer Orc Army to go alongside any self respecting goblin. they have deals to have several units of the green skins. So take a look at the kickstarter if you'd like a core for an Orc Warhammer Fantasy army.

They've already funded and have reached their stretch goal, so now you can get a scout tower as well to go with them.

Hobgoblins of the Black Waste for The Woods
by Oakbound Studio

Well, I think that's it for this week. I know there's been quite a lot of grumbling, too much for my liking really. I hope you'll all understand and allow me a tough period. I don't plan on it lasting much longer, though I need to some how lay plans for it to not feel so bad again. It's felt tough and I think it's only while writing this post that I realise that there are ways out of some of this stuff. I think I've already laid plans to get out of this. There are a few people I think I could approach who can understand. There is even a group that I can start back with, I think, but I may have to make apologies for taking such a long sabbatical. So things aren't now as bad as they seemed.

That just leaves it for me to end with my usual slot. During the writing of this post, I've been tucking into a nice mug of tea, and a lovely mug of coffee, which I shouldn't make too strong in case of migraines. Also, while I've been writing this, I've been listening to my favourite gaming YouTuber play Minecraft. Gopher playing Minecraft has a certain settling quality to it. It's ideal for having on in the background.

And so, I'll end this post with wishing you good health and a good week. I hope it was better than mine and I hope that this coming week is better than the last, with something to tell you that's actually productive.